i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
