My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
