If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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