Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
