she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
