so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
