operation harelip BJ is a go
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I got inside last night via doggy door
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
