so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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