Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Rumble strips road head = magical
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
