ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize