did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Randomize
