I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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