I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
