It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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