There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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