just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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