well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
