I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
