once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
