I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
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