She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
