the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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