Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
