I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
