K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
id be glad to
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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