I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
