i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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