After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
so much tequila, so little girl.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
