they need to just BURY HIM!
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize