i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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