I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
