You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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