a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
