I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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