I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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