my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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