I swear she didn't look like that last week.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
