i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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