Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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