Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize