he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
