two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
