capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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