JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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