Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize
