I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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