white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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