lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
