tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
