We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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