think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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