i permit you to call me
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
